There are many types of relationships within a school community that can affect a student’s sense of belonging. When nurturing relationships in education it is not exclusive to students. Considerations of adult culture are also important in shaping the overall school climate. Additionally, community members and families are also relevant in the development of relationships, as they all are contributing factors to student development and the school community.
The Student-Teacher Relationship
The student and the teacher are the obvious first relationship to consider. Foundationally, trust and respect can navigate the effects of this relationship. When students feel a positive connection to teachers and experience positive interactions with them, they are likely to engage in learning and experience emotional well-being.2 Getting to know students beyond the surface level and understanding where they come from, their interests, their daily life and their individual and unique strengths and needs can all help foster authentic relationships between teacher and student.
Strategically working to understand students at their core can build trust and cultivate belonging when they feel valued and respected. Likewise, sharing who you are with students can help build trust and allow students to feel connected.
According to my experience, key aspects of building relationships with my students include the following:
- Open communication
- Clear and transparent communication
- Consistent caring
- Greetings with a smile
- Active listening
- Asking questions
- Empowering one another
- Collaboration
The Student-Student Relationship
Peer support and friendship are vital to belonging to a school community. Peer support and friendships can help students navigate social complexities and school life. They can also help students form the prosocial behaviors needed to live in this world. Relationships among students need to be safe, respectful, cooperative and caring. Creating conditions conducive to students building relationships with one another can help cultivate positive and prosocial relationships. Through collaboration and teamwork, educators can help foster a sense of belonging.
As an educator who regularly works with students, here’s how to help them build relationships with their peers:
- Organize activities that are conducive to collaboration and problem-solving together
- Ask students to interview one another
- Change up the classroom seating arrangements
- Allow student choice for seating or projects
- Model positive social behaviors and relationship skills
- Provide opportunities for connecting
- Allow peer mentoring
- Create classroom or school “families” as a support system
- Consider student committees and advisories or extracurricular clubs for like-minded individuals to connect based on interests
- Peer tutoring
- Service-learning projects
The Student-Staff Relationship
While teacher-to-student relationships are important for trust, engagement and a safe environment, there are also many other adults in the school building that connect with students. Their interactions with students also matter.
For example, consider a student’s school day:
- A student’s school day begins when they enter the bus and encounter the bus driver.
- Upon entering the building, they are often greeted by paraprofessionals or support staff on duty.
- Later, they interact with individuals in the lunchroom.
- They may also communicate with custodians, nurses or other support staff.
The way students respect these individuals matters, and vice versa. Having a trusting adult in the building to feel safe and belonging is crucial for student well-being. Furthermore, the respect of the students toward the staff and valuing them as individuals can elevate their well-being and, ultimately, the overall school climate.
In my experience, there are simple ways to connect students and staff:
- Have a staff member at the door in the morning to greet students by name
- Highlight staff members in the newsletters or monthly announcements
- Each class “adopts” an adult in the building to interview and get to know them
- Have staff participate in training and school events
- Use staff as part of student mentoring “families”
- Encourage students to address staff and adults in the building by name and respectfully
The Teacher-Teacher Relationship
Adult culture sets the tone for students as they model behavior for them. The relationships among teachers and all adults in the building are crucial for both student development and adult well-being. Additionally, connectedness strengthens collaboration efforts among teachers. When they share ideas and resources or offer support to each other, it bolsters their teaching practices and promotes a cohesive school community, positively impacting student success.
Research shows that faculty members who feel connected and belong in a school community experience greater job satisfaction, leading to greater retention.3,4 When adults feel connected to someone at work and have a sense of belonging in a community where they are valued, they also feel self-efficacy and belonging.6 Such empowerment and personal self-worth can contribute to well-being and an overall positive school climate.7
Some ways to foster relationships in the adult culture include:
- Opportunities for collaboration
- Ample professional support
- Recognition and appreciation
- Empowerment and autonomy
- Cohesive and consistent communication and support
- Opportunities for self-growth
- Team builders
- Retreats
- Mentorship and buddies among adults
- Check-in days
- Time in staff meetings for connecting
- Real activities that allow adults to build trust and be vulnerable with one another
The Family Relationship
Families are an integral part of student development as they often play a big role in supporting students’ school experiences. Families are also a part of the school community and should be involved in events, decisions and school focus. Having effective communication with families of students can enhance student success and help build trusting relationships, which can result in a positive model for students.
School teachers, staff and administration should see parents and families as partners in collaboration, rather than just an audience for school updates or clients who only attend conferences and resources. Families should be a part of the learning and school community.
In order for that to occur, strong, trusting and authentic relationships need to be built. Ways to build relationships with families include the following:
- Parent surveys about their interests, skills and characteristics
- Interviews and getting to know you events
- Vulnerable interactions of honesty
- Collaboration
- Two-way communication
- Positive communication and affirmations
- Find opportunities for family members to be involved within their comfort level and skill level
The School-Community Relationships
When considering the external community and who might be involved in the school, think about local agencies and individuals who might be vested in the development of students. For example, law enforcement might be interested in educating students to help promote positive behaviors. There may be a local farmer or garden that could partner for student service-learning opportunities and educate students on health and nutrition.
By engaging with the broader community and building relationships and partnerships, the schools can help educate students on responsibility and citizenship, while also helping contribute to the betterment of the local community.
Some ways to connect with the broader community include:
- Asking individuals to visit for assemblies or in the classroom to talk about their work
- Requesting students to volunteer to help businesses
- Inviting the businesses to school events and activities
- Requesting the broader community to be a part of committees
- Working as a school to thank and honor the community individuals and organizations
- Collaborating in partnerships for the benefit of students and the community
